Tender Hearts

My daughter Tessa is definitely a tender heart like her mom. The little sweetie recently broke down in sobs watching two movies that are supposed to be comedies.

We were all watching “Over The Hedge,” an animated movie whose plot revolves around the efforts of a raccoon to procure enough junk food to replenish the stash he stole from a large and quite angry bear. He journeys to the suburbs and finds a group of animals whose forest has been invaded by a subdivision while they’ve been hibernating. He teaches them the ins and outs of stealing and eating human food. Long story short, at one point a victim of their burglary hires an exterminator to get rid of the pests. He captures them and puts them in cages. Tessa was absolutely wailing when this happened. I tried telling her, “I bet they’ll get away. Don’t worry,” but she was inconsolable. She recuperated after the animals escaped, but we didn’t watch that movie again.

My next effort at humor was a movie called “The Great Outdoors.” It’s a silly movie about not-so-friendly in-laws spending a week at a cabin where they have an encounter with a bald-headed bear (who also winds up with a bald butt at the end). There’s a really funny scene where John Candy is giving his son pointers on water-skiing and winds up being pulled behind the boat. He goes for a really wild and hilarious ride. Tessa was mad and me and her Pop for laughing at his antics. “It’s not funny. He’s gonna get hurt.” I could have given her a long discourse on how most humor is based upon the misfortune of others, but I just said, “It’s supposed to be funny. He’ll be okay.” She wasn’t buying it. Then, she felt sorry for the bear when it winds up with a bald butt. “That bear was nice,” she opined. “It’s not nice to shoot his butt.” Yes, she did shed a tear or two at this part.

Then again, me criticizing her sensitivity is definitely the pot calling the kettle black. I cry at the drop of a hat and have been called “oversensitive” many a time. I usually think of Bridget as being the strong type, but she has her weepy moments, too. The other day we were watching another comedy, “Honey I Shrunk the Kids”. The girls were really liking it, up until the part where “Anty” (an ant who aided the kids in their efforts to cross the back yard) gets killed by a scorpion. This time it was Bridget who was crying really hard. Tessa was sad but, curiously, did not break down this time. Nope. This time, I was the other boo-hoo’er. It really was touching because Anty had saved Ron’s life. Sob.

Maybe we should stick with horror movies. Damn! I just remembered how Tessa broke down crying when the police came and took “Bad Ronald” away at the end of the movie. Guess there’s no cry-proof entertainment with three tender-hearts in the family.